The True Purpose of Life 人生の真目的

After I returned home from the hospital, I began to read the essays in the now defunct Shinshu monthly magazine Jikoh (the Light of Compassion) published by the late Rev. Masao Hanada in Nagoya. Rev. Hanada published the first issue in April 1949 and continued to publish it until July 1986. He died a little before the last issue was printed. Fortunately, I received the whole collection from someone, but unfortunately, I have hardly read the essays yet.

One of the essays in the July 1949 issue is entitled "The True Purpose of Life" written by the late Dr. Kunpachi Awa. Dr. Awa was a medical doctor and a devout Shin follower. This essay is in fact his last writing. He says that he feels extremely fortunate that he had encountered the Buddha Dharma and was going to be born in the Pure Land after this life came to an end. In this sense, he had already fulfilled the true purpose of life. From this viewpoint, he feels that his faith in the Dharma is the most important thing in life, and his secular activity as a doctor is of secondary importance.

However, it does not mean that he treated his profession lightly. The harder he worked as a doctor, the more keenly he realized that he was doing so only to gratify himself and that he did not have such a noble mind as to sacrifice himself for the benefit of others. Furthermore, Even though he worked hard for his profession, unless he had heard the teaching of the Buddha, he would never had recognized his evil-bound nature. In front of the teaching of the Buddha as the mirror, he could see vividly his true ugly self. That is why, Dr. Awa says, he had never reduced his work load even though he had to miss a Dharma talk by doing so.

Dr. Awa says, as he looks back at his life, all his life's experiences in the past had been to guide him to the Buddha's Compassion. He feels he had achieved hardly anything in his profession, but his entire life was a process of deeper entrusting himself to the Buddha's Vow.

Then Dr. Awa's true last words are: "What truly makes me grateful is not that I have become grateful to the Buddha's Compassion, but that the Buddha has never abandoned this man who fails to feel grateful to the Compassion. (Paraphrased by Arai based on July 1949 issue of Jikoh)

I thought this essay is very instructive for us to think about the relationship between our religious and secular aspects of life.

退院後新しく始めたことは、かつて名古屋におられた花田正夫師が毎月発行しておられた『慈光』誌を読むことです。『慈光』は1949年4月号から1986年7月号まで連綿と発行されました。花田師が亡くなられたのは最後の発行の少し前でした。私は幸運なことに花田師の法友であった榊原徳草師の息子さんの榊原直樹師から全巻ひとそろいをいただいたのですが、残念なことにまだ読み始めてはいませんでした。

1949年7月号所収のエッセイの一つに阿波勲八師による「人生の真目的」というのがあります。同師は医師でしたが、熱心な真宗門徒でした。このエッセイは同師の最後の、いわば絶筆です。まず阿波師は、「自分は仏法の出遇えて、この世の命が終わるとお浄土に参らせていただく身になったことはまことに幸運であった。この意味では人生の真目的は達成したと言ってもよい。この観点から言うと、人生では仏法が最重要であり、医師としての職業は二次的な重要性しか持たない」と言っています。

同師はさらに続けて、「だからといって、自分は職業をおろそかにしてきたわけではない。医師として働けば働くほど、自分は自分自身を喜ばせるためにやっているだけで、他人のために自分を犠牲にしようなんて高尚な気持ちは自分にはさらさらないことに気づかされる。さらに、いくら職業を一生懸命にしても、仏の教えに遇わなければ、自分の悪に満ちた本性には気づかなかったであろう。仏法のという鏡の前で、自分の醜い姿がありありと見えてくる。そういう意味で、自分はたとえ聞法の機会があったとしても自分の仕事の時間を短くするようなことはなかった」と言います。

阿波師は「自分の人生を振り返ると、すべての経験が仏の慈悲に導いてくださっていた。仕事の上ではほとんど何も功績はないが、自分の全人生は入信の経路にほかならない」と結んでいます。

そして阿波師の本当の絶筆は「仏の慈悲を有り難く思えるようになったことが有り難いのではない。有り難く思えぬ奴を相変わらずお相手くださることが有り難いのである。」（1949年7月号『慈光』誌に基づいて要約しました）

この文は、私たちの宗教生活と世俗生活の関係を考える上に示唆に富んでいると考えました。